


you could treat me better if you really wanted to

by manesalex



Series: Resentment [1]
Category: Roswell New Mexico (TV 2019)
Genre: Alex Manes Needs a Hug, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Fix-It, Good Guy Kyle Valenti, Kyle Valenti is a Good Friend, Other, POV Kyle Valenti, References to Abuse, References to Gaslighting, ableistic comment, alcohol use, mentions of Michael Guerin/Alex Manes - Freeform, mentions of Michael Guerin/Maria Deluca - Freeform, mentions of canon Michael Guerin/Alex Manes/Maria Deluca, references to sexual assault/dubcon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-21
Updated: 2020-04-21
Packaged: 2021-03-01 16:53:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,302
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23770381
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/manesalex/pseuds/manesalex
Summary: Kyle helps Alex get a break from Roswell.
Relationships: Alex Manes & Kyle Valenti
Series: Resentment [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1712398
Comments: 24
Kudos: 120





	you could treat me better if you really wanted to

**Author's Note:**

> This is for all of my fellow Alex fans who are hurting right now. I hope this helps just a bit.

“Where’s Alex?” Liz asks when the rest of the group is gathered in the Crashdown for the latest update.

Kyle sighs, waving his phone, “Alex is working on all of this remotely. I’ll keep him updated on anything he needs to know.”

“Oh, is he sick? Is his prosthetic bothering him?” Liz asks quickly. Kyle is surprised by her concern, based on what he knows, but maybe she had convinced herself of something that wasn’t true to excuse all of this.

“You do realize what you’re all asking of him all the damn time, don’t you?” Kyle finally asks, unable to hold it in any longer. Watching his best friend break apart last night had been the final straw. “He’s risking court-martial for you every day. At best a dishonorable discharge. He’s regularly dealing with his father for all of you. And he doesn’t complain. He just keeps giving you everything you ask for, everything you want, no matter how much it hurts him.” He takes a deep breath before turning to look directly at Maria and Michael, “And you two? You two should be ashamed of yourselves. What did he _ever_ do to you that makes you think he deserves to be treated like that?! You used his trauma and his love for you both against him. You manipulated him and you told yourself it was okay. You didn’t even give a shit about how any of that affected him. Because you both got what _you_ wanted.”

* * *

_Kyle wakes to a pounding at his door. He looks up at his clock, at the glowing 8:00 AM and pushes to his feet. It’s probably Liz again, pestering him on his one day off, but, on the off chance it isn’t..._

_He’s surprised to see Alex on his doorstep, tears streaming down his face. He’s in little more than a white t-shirt, a jacket, and jeans, both messy and awkwardly put on, like he had scrambled to get dressed. “Were you serious about that beer?”_

_“Come on in, man? Maybe skip right to the whiskey?”_

_And so it all comes out of Alex. His adventure with Maria, how he had almost died, how they had all gone back to Michael’s to patch him up. How Maria had kissed Michael in front of him, had forced him into a kiss, though he doesn’t say those exact words. He mentions that he wanted to leave. That he said as much, both before and after. What had happened between him and Maria and Michael and how he had left the morning after, feeling more alone than ever. How he had let Michael decide how it felt for him, but he didn’t feel loved. He felt used._

_“Alex, I think maybe you should take a vacation? Maybe go out to the cabin? Or go completely out of town? I think… You need to see a therapist and you need to get somewhere safe.”_

_“Nowhere is safe, Kyle,” Alex admits softly. “I only ever felt safe with him and now... I know he loves me, but... Even after this, I thought… I’m so stupid.”_

_“You’re not stupid, man,” he replies, refilling Alex’s drink. “Look, take my bed, I’ll crash on the couch. And we’ll figure out what you should do tomorrow. But… I know you love them both, but I think you need to set up boundaries with them. You… You set them up with me, right? You can do that with them. I’ll help you if you want.”_

_“Thanks, Kyle,” Alex replies, leaning into him. “You’re a good friend.”_

* * *

“What did you mean we manipulated him?!” Maria stalks after Kyle as he leaves the Crashdown. “We love him! We wanted to-”

“How many times did he tell you he wanted to go, Maria? Who was this really about? Comforting Alex, who had been stabbed? Because there are so many ways that you could have comforted him that didn’t involve ignoring him saying ‘no’. Or was it all about you and Michael. Making Michael feel better because he could have both of you for once? And making yourself feel better about the ways you’ve hurt Alex?” He takes a deep breath before saying, “You know about his dad, Maria. You know what his father did to him. And you know how that man doesn’t know love or acceptance. And you _weaponized_ his need for both.”

“I didn’t-”

“I know you didn’t mean to, Maria. You probably didn’t even realize you were doing it. But you did it. And you’re finding all kinds of excuses for it. As if Alex doesn’t already find excuses to forgive you both for every damn thing you do to him!” He takes a breath. “Stay the fuck away from him right now.” He turns around and walks away, ignoring her calling after him.

* * *

Kyle is at home, just having finished texting Alex the details he needs to know over the encrypted messaging program Alex had set up on his phone. He’d left the rest of it out, not sure if he’d crossed a line. In truth, he probably had. But Alex isn’t going to stand up for himself, so Kyle will, knowing Alex will probably tell him off for it. At least he’s someone Alex will stand up to. Maybe the only one who actually loves him who Alex will stand up to.

He startles at the knock on the door, but stands up to answer it. Only to find Michael standing there, smelling like bourbon and acetone, barely holding himself up. He’s instantly aware of how badly this can go. But he steps aside and lets Michael in.

“He told me he felt loved,” he sounds hurt and confused.

“Did he?” Kyle asks, well aware of the answer. “Or did you tell him that’s how he felt and he just… Agreed with you?”

Michael’s face falls at that. But he doesn’t answer.

“Guerin, he loves you both. More than himself. I don’t think he thinks he’s worthy of either one of you. You know, he said you were a good man? And that he is evil? He’ll accept whatever you give him. Because he loves you. No matter how much you hurt him. And because he doesn’t think he deserves to be loved. And he wants you to be happy.” Kyle pauses, considering. He knows what Alex would want him to say. Alex would want him to comfort Michael Guerin. To tell him it was okay to treat him like that. But he can’t. He won’t. “You’re not the only one who grew up feeling unloved, Guerin. You’ve met his dad, right?”

“Yeah, he-” he looks at his left hand, still wrapped up, and then back at Kyle.

“He hates Alex. Because he’s gay. He tried to change him.” He pauses, “And his mom is gone too, you know.”

“I didn’t-” Michael objects, cutting himself off.

“I know,” Kyle replies. He considers again what Alex would want him to say. He can’t do it. He can’t absolve Michael. But he can give him something. “Figure it out, Guerin. If you really love him more than yourself, you need to figure out how to love him right or you need to let him go. And let him find someone who can love him the way he deserves.”

He grabs Michael’s truck keys from him before ushering him back out the door. “I’ll have Liz pick these up for you. Walk home, Guerin.” Then he shuts and locks the door behind him, well aware that it won’t really keep him out if he wants to come in.

He returns his attention to his phone, slowly typing out a message to Alex, “ _See any cute boys in Austin yet?_ ” He plants himself on the couch, turning on the TV and waiting for a reply.

**Author's Note:**

> I may write more in this universe in a while. I have a vague plan that may or may not happen. So, if you want more with eventual endgame Malex (probably), you can subscribe to the series. Thanks!


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